Yesterday i had this weird feeling and very sudden thought.... and i realized... i m very possessive of all my guy friends!! Oh...NO! not an issue i wanted in addition to all my other problems in life... i have many already and no need to add injury to my big gapping wound which is festering and rotting....dah..lah, i have to struggle with keeping this wound clean with God’s hydrogen peroxide so can heal faster....add another blow....
Suddenly this fact struck me when i was talking to 2 of my brothers and i said this.... “all my guy frens dem sayang me...even if they ppk their gfs they dun ppk me.... and i was in d pichwer even before their gfs turned up...” now dat i think bout it, sounds so tak betul man... they r jus my guy frens...yes, we are very close....probably some even closer than their own gfs....and quite a few been friends for more than 3 yrs... and gfs come and go...we walked together through many bumpy roads... and maybe i just got this idea... they are permanently in my life.... whereas girl friends and boy friends are temporary.... you know something like your house and holiday villa.... this doesn’t apply to all guys...only those whom i consider my closest guy buddies.... so u can guess....who’s home and who’s holiday retreat? It’s a matter of mindset that i have to change....yet i find myself so reluctant to let go of them.... for what ever reason...because they are equally devoted to me... and i am not bothered by the fact that they are far away and they have gfs... not a big deal to me.... cause i dun have “extra” feelings for them....nothing more than my bestest frens.... and i love them a lot... they know that... and they love me a lot... and
i’m sure they will never let me go.... one even promised me that if he breaks all the relationships in the world, he will never let me go... think his gf will have a fit if she ever get to know about this.... oh, boy...tot it was sweet...and they can tell me they love me...and i will just say; “love ya too!” didn’t find anything wrong with these relationships until some people start giving me weird looks and started lecturing me....and now i am suddenly rethinking.... am i doing the wrong thing? Is it wrong to have many close guy buddies? The answer is a definite NO. and i am never letting them go unless God says so and if they say so....doubt they will....after receiving so much crap from me... and i merajuk a lot... they still love me...shows that 1 cor 13 is real even for bestest guy buddies ever! Always thought i have a very big heart...can fit everybadi in.... hehe, sorta unlimited space... can love everybody... unlimited.... does God’s love have limits? Non as far as i can see....even if it does....it won’t be finite to any human... not calculate-able...
so how am i suppose to love? As 1 Cor 13... or as the world says.... “gals and guys shudn’t be dat close. I don’t believe gals and guys can be best frens.”
I’ve decided.... i will love whoever i choose to love, whenever i want to... and as hard as i can.... because God loves everyone, all the time and to the point ....He gave His all.... why shouldn’t i go all out to love others too? Because the world say....it’s inappropriate? It’s not right for a gal to....? guys always have ulterior motives? Didn’t Jesus know all these before He came?
Isn’t it inappropriate to love us? We are so imperfect after all....
Is it not right for Him to speak to a prostitute much less save one from being stoned? He did it anyway....
Don’t we all have ulterior motives? From herod... pilate...the jews...to all of us.... i do, i must admit....
He knew....
He loved and still loves us....yesterday, today, tomorrow until eternity....
And i will too likewise follow the footsteps of my Lord....however imperfect this world and i am.....
1 comment:
Enjoyed a lot!
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