I have been in hibernation for the past 2 weeks besides going back to Adelaide for the weekend and clinic sessions on weekdays. Think I sort off enjoy the hermit life. Like Yen and I said…. “umang umang” supposedly with orange shell and small yellow flowers… well, it’s sort off nice to ignore the world once in a while and jut do my own thing, not have to worry bout others but just pleasing myself. It’s certainly a selfish way to live in the long run but for short breaks…. It sometimes is a relief… I think sometimes I just want to ignore the entire world including God, everything and just shut up from everything. It is however not possible to do that without people around trying to break into my “umang-umang” shell…. And it does get lonely, thus my online relationships on msn with people… they are safe, they don’t make me feel like I have any obligations to pretend to be anything… oh well, I could look like crap in my pajamas n still yak on msn…. And yet sometimes some people break into my peace and quiet and make me deal with issues I would rather not deal with…. For e.g., family problems, friendship issues, this and that…. May be minor or major… disturbing my currently really quiet and boring life…. and it forces me out of my shell… which is uncomfortable, can see why “umang umang” like to hide in the shell. It’s hard, it’s safe, the world out there is a dangerous place for a softie…. You will get hurt….

Nothing drastic has happened…. I just like my alone moments… and yet not be lonely…. Which is not entirely possible. There was no one in d house for the past 3 days and I was totally fine. I cleaned the kitchen, toilet, baked, plucked oranges…. Watched my Korean shows… as I have been for the past 2 weeks…. And it kills time. It takes up so much time actually just waiting for it to stream, I think by the time I finish watching like 3 korean shows it’s time for me to sleep…. Man, this life certainly is as if I am so super free and need not study… which isn’t true…. I should be studying…. But this GP rotation has been really chill, the docs are nice…. I read up a couple of things… but otherwise, I really don’t see the need to study that hard…. I tried, 1^stnd week, clinical problems in general medicine and surgery… week… oxford clinical handbook. I finished ecg part n some cvs stuff… 2 I think I studied bout 5 cases…. Or better, mostly bout lumps in the neck, groin, breast etc. all my surgery knowledge flew off after hols last year. Might be earlier than that… blerggghhhh… post holiday syndrome… it’s hard to jump start myself to study, I even brought my books back home to study… I didn’t even touch them….my procrastinating self…. I am an expert at wasting time… there should be a Procrastination Competition… I m sure I qualify and have a good chance at winning too, on the other hand, might have a lot of competition… *_*

Looking forward to going back to Adelaide in 4 days times… and even more to going back to KL to my sayang… listening to Disney songs now…. Mulan – a girl worth fighting for. It’s quite funny… at times like this listening to some funny weird songs, just suits current mood…. 4 days I hope it passes soon… but 3 weeks please pass so super slowly… really hope Manila will give me a big kick in the butt and get me moving for some time… you know sometimes when life becomes too mundane, need something different to happen to shake me out of this procrastination… it’s something that is a big problem for me…. When there is something really urgent for me to, I will just do it all out… but then if nothing much turns up after that… I will be taking this break…. Trust me can be quite prolonged… until the next something turns up…. And if it doesn’t I go into this slow mode…. Really kemalasan terserlah…. Nick said… you like a cat, can sleep for 20 hours… I don’t think cats do that. Koalas do that… well, ya…. In super procrastination mode, I probably can laze for 20 hrs… n only have 4 productive hours a day…. Of well, eating, msn ing, watching anime or Korean movies… seeing friends, going out….. I suppose it’s a good thing I m studying medicine as well… need to always study and be on my toes, if I were in one of those courses where can skip a lot of classes and exams twice a year… I think I would be lazing through my year….